[phobiaphobe]

...Be prepared.

I was so excited to ride that I didn't really pack everything that I needed. I brought a change of underwear, some socks, 2 shirts, and somehow neglected to bring pants. I did bring my camera at least. Enjoy the pictures.

Cruised solo from Calgary to Rocky Mountain House on Saturday evening. Took it pretty easy, stopped every half hour or so to clean bug snot from my visor. Arrived in Rocky by about 8pm, discussed plans with Tom and my dad on what we were doing in the morning. MY new Shark helmet had caused me much discomfort and left a bright red hotspot on my forehead from the ride down. I decided to carve out a bit of the foam in the front of the helmet. Tom suggested that I could get better results carving off a piece of my forehead, and offered to help. We had a beer, Tom went home, and I hit the hay.

We gassed up at 9am and discussed our options over Bacon n' Eggers and coffee. THe forecast called for a 60% chance of rain. It was drizzling and cold (about 10 degrees) but we decided that we'd ride as far as Nordegg (an old coal mining ghost-town that marks the entrance into the Rockies) and re-evaluate.

We made it to Nordegg without much drama. It had rained, albeit lightly on us the whole way there, but our spirits still weren't as damp as our skivvies. "The back of my balls are all wet" exclaimed Tom. "Not the front so much, but the back of my balls". So we took shelter in the local hotel / restaurant / tavern, etc. for hot coffee and drying of scrotums. May as well introduce the cast. Tom: best friend since forever, got into motorcycles about 18 months ago, rides a CBR600RR, has been waaaay too busy to do any real riding all summer, too stupid to bring raingear, but at least he sprayed his leathers. Rex (dad): father since forever, rode motorcycles since forever, rides (the **** out of) an ST1300, has been waaaay too busy to do any real riding this year. Yours truly, me, riding since I was 8, ride a CBR1000RR, have been waaaaay too crashed to do any real riding this summer, too stupid to bring raingear, in spite of weather forecast. I think I was in denial.

So as you can see, the three of us were desperate to ride, and this would be one of our only chances to ride together until next year.

The rain got worse. We drank more coffee. Nobody even entertained the idea of giving up and heading home. The rain got still worse. We ordered the special; a Hawaiian Burger, complete with pineapple ring and cold French fries. The sky fell, we drank more coffee. 2 hours passed in the Nordegg hotel / restaurant / tavern etc and miraculously, the weather started to break. We quickly geared up and continued west. THe roads were still wet but the sun was starting to dry us and the weather continued to improve.

I switched motorcycles with my dad for a short time. The ST1300 was a pleasant surprise. I've been making fun of his "Lincoln" since he traded his VFR for it this spring, but I did enjoy riding it. I took off from a stop and backed off the throttle once I hit about 65Mph. Well it felt like 65mph; I was doing 100. This motorcycle is deceptively fast, and turns way quicker than a 700lb wheeled vehicle has any right to. With the windshield raised, not a droplet of mist pelted me, and wind buffeting was completely absent. It's more comfortable than my Sealy Posture-Pedic. Dad waved me over to trade back after about 10 minutes. The 1000RR is uncomfortable as hell, and a bit of a handful. On the wet roads, a heavy throttle hand in 6th gear would produce furious wheelspin. He wanted his heated grips and Heli-Bars back.

We arrived at the Saskatchewan River Crossing in no time flat. THe road (and our scrotums) had dried and the long, fast mountain sweepers were satisfying. We gassed up and continued on to the Columbia Icefield, a tourist Mecca crawling with monster-truck busses full of Japanese people. We stopped at "The Keyhole" as per tradition and made a few passes for the camera. There was altogether too much traffic for any real high-speed knee-down antics, but it was still fun. Dad scuffed the Bridgestones on his ST right to the edge. Tom realized that he had no license plate. It fell off on the way up. He managed to find it on the way back though. Run over a few times, but still good.

A few photos at the glacier, and then head home. Stopped at the Crossing again for fuel. Took some photos of a couple of interesting old Hondas. One original (rat) Hurricane and something I didn't know existed, a VTR250. Cool. Some badass yuppy Harley dudes pulled up and parked, replete with leather tassles and useless "pudding bowl" helmets. These guys were about 15 feet from us, and my dad starts on this anecdote about this "IDIOT I WORKS WITH THAT WILL ONLY WEAR HIS PUDDING BOWL WHEN HE RIDES HIS HARLEY NEVER A REAL HELMET WHAT A ****ING IDIOT WITH HIS STUPID PUDDING BOWL." He had his earplugs in, and was shouting way louder than he realized. Tom and I were laughing uncontrollably at the situation. He thought we were laughing at his story, which made him repeat it a few times, each time progressively louder and more vibrantly. Hilarious.

About 50 miles into the trip home, all hell breaks loose and it starts to POUR. Dad, warm and dry with his heated grips and big windshield, cruised on casually, passing 4 cars at a time in the driving rain, beating Tom and I home by about 20 minutes. I shivered my way home, keeping myself moving with thoughts of hot showers and lattes. I pull into the driveway in ROcky and try to pry myself off the bike. Knees, neck, hands are seized almost solid. My dad, warm and dry just laughed. "MAYBE YOU SHOULD BUY AN ST1300" Take your earplugs out dad.

Ate dinner, tried to dry my stuff, bundled up and headed for home. The sun had come out again, so I figured I'd race the weather back to Calgary. The weather won. About 3/4 of the way, with 60 miles remaining, the sky turned black and it POURED. Sheets of rain. I couldn't see a damn thing. I slowed to about 40, riding on the shoulder and waving cars past me. I imagined their comments as they passed in their warm warm vehicles. "I don't envy that guy", "oh that poor young man", and "HA-HA, asshole".

Made it home by 10, had another hot shower, then a hot chocolate, then a massage. Why the hell didn't I bring raingear? Oh well still worth it.

Pics: (in no particular order)

http://www.fireblades.org/gallery/br...p?c=723&userid=

[ReaperAZ]

Not being prepared for rain really sucks. Been there before, and I don't envy you one bit. The worst is when it's cold, as I'm sure you know. I too have been "stuck" on the bike after a cold rainy ride home. How the leathers hold up for ya? Good read, thanks for sharing.

[phobiaphobe]

Best $200 I ever spent, thank you. What's the best way to dry them out? I just hung them in the basement.

[ReaperAZ]

Originally Posted by phobiaphobe

Best $200 I ever spent, thank you. What's the best way to dry them out? I just hung them in the basement.

I would think hanging them will work fine.

[BDA116]

Doesn't Toyota make a special leather drying machine?

[phobiaphobe]

Yes. Can I borrow yours?

[dB]

Cool ride. I highly recommend investing in a good rain suit, heated vest and grips.

Riding with your dad must be a kick.

[phobiaphobe]

Originally Posted by dB

Cool ride. I highly recommend investing in a good rain suit, heated vest and grips.

Riding with your dad must be a kick.

Heated vest I'll definitely be installing soon.

Riding with my dad is great. He is a 56 Y/O squid, and has been seen pulling monos on his ST.

He was actually riding with a suspended license this weekend. He racked up too many tickets and got a 1-month suspension. He gave me his truck keys at the start of the ride and told me if he had to run from the cops he'd call me to come pick him up.

[ReaperAZ]

How many miles was this trip?

[phobiaphobe]

Calgary to Rocky: 125

Rocky to Icefield and back: 302

Back to Calgary: 125

552 total.

[ReaperAZ]

Not a bad little trek. No way my ass could sit on my 600RR seat that long.

[phobiaphobe]

The Corbin made it quite a bit more bearable. My wrists and neck ached but never my ass.

[BDA116]

Originally Posted by phobiaphobe

The Corbin made it quite a bit more bearable. My wrists and neck ached but never my ass.

There's a joke in there somewhere, but I'm not good enough to find it.

[phobiaphobe]

Originally Posted by BDA116

There's a joke in there somewhere, but I'm not good enough to find it.

Wrong answer. You should have said:

"That must be because you're a giver, not a taker."

[colryn]

Originally Posted by phobiaphobe

Wrong answer. You should have said:

"That must be because you're a giver, not a taker."

Oh my gosh... That's just wrong....

[RRWANTR]

Originally Posted by phobiaphobe

"That must be because you're a giver, not a taker."

Not necessarily......"Pete" said something about a new polish job......now is that giving or taking....hmmmmm...

[luvtolean]

I thought we were going to hear about a fall into a crevasse or something.

Did you take the monster bus ride?

Beautiful country up there, and the bus is cool.

[phobiaphobe]

Both pitchers and catchers can polish indiscriminately without altering their status.

[phobiaphobe]

Originally Posted by luvtolean

I thought we were going to hear about a fall into a crevasse or something.

Did you take the monster bus ride?

Beautiful country up there, and the bus is cool.

Didn't take the bus ride. It's $80.00, not really worth it IMO. They have built an incredible road that winds up alongside the glacier, but it's off limits to the public. I'd love to sneak on to it, but they'd probably lynch me.

The glacier itself is pretty treacherous. It has receded about an 8th mile in the last 100 years or so and is full of crevasses and thin ice.

[luvtolean]

Yep, I did it more than 10 years ago, but I thought it was worth it really. (especially since Dad paid. ) Very cool tourist attraction, it's one of the most memorable. I think it has some claim to fame like steepest grade on a tourist route or something.

[phobiaphobe]

We just go there for the riding. I grew up in that area, so I guess I'm de-sensitized a bit to the tourist attraction type things.

So on your way there you probably passed through a shitty little town called Rocky Mountain House. I was 13 at the time and may or may not have thrown a beer can at your car.

[ReaperAZ]

Originally Posted by phobiaphobe

I was 13 at the time and may or may not have thrown a beer can at your car.

[luvtolean]

Originally Posted by phobiaphobe

So on your way there you probably passed through a shitty little town called Rocky Mountain House. I was 13 at the time and may or may not have thrown a beer can at your car.

Actually, last night I was thinking about it, you probably would've been around 8.

I understand though, I used to live on a "tourist road" and it was obnoxious at times.

[dB]

Phobe was drinking beer at 8? Ah ha!

[phobiaphobe]

Don't act surprised.

[ReaperAZ]

Originally Posted by dB

Phobe was drinking beer at 8? Ah ha!

Late start by Canadian standards.