Was I too harsh?

sheepofblue · 05-09-2005, 11:38 PM

I just got back from Wal Mart. There was a fellow that asked me in the aprking lot if I knew anything about transmissions, I kind of hinted no (although I did work at Hydramatic for a spell). Well he proceeds to ask how much fluid it would take if a coolant line broke and the car stopped. We talked for a bit and I gave him some info and estimated 4 qts. Well he then says that all he has is two bucks and his girl is with him out in the car on I565 and he is from Centreville AL. and gives the do you have any you could spare pitch. Well I said no but something tugged a bit as he was sweaty but sober and coherant. Also the sweaty didn't have the month old bum stink. So I asked if he had ID figuring if he did and it said he was from out of town I would give him a few bucks. Well he did not so I didn't (he claimed it was still in the car). Part of me said he was legit and needed a hand, another part said beggar or bum (I have less than zero sympathy for either). In the end I did not give him any cash. So my question is do you think I missed and opportunity to help someone really in a bind (something that has happened for me and I was hugely grateful for) or miss getting fleeced by a beggar?

EDIT: Cooling line not coolant, thus trans fluid

I was letting the eginerd in me leak out

nomad · 05-09-2005, 11:55 PM

That's a pretty good story but why would he go to Walmart to by coolant for his transmission with no wallet... Uhm... I think you guessed correctly. But hey, you got to give the enterprising man credit.

I think eitherway, the guy was in a bind.

I hear these stories all the time downtown. My gut always says I should pay them but I can't justify giving handouts because I think it encourages the problem rather than resolves a persons crisis.

davef · 05-09-2005, 11:59 PM

The whole thing sounds a little weird...I say he was a bum. However, time is money and you've spent time wondering about this. It would have been worth it to give him a couple of bucks just to save yourself some time.

Either way, don't sweat it.

sheepofblue · 05-10-2005, 12:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by davef

The whole thing sounds a little weird...I say he was a bum. However, time is money and you've spent time wondering about this. It would have been worth it to give him a couple of bucks just to save yourself some time.

Either way, don't sweat it.

Money is fine but I would take as much joy in helping someone really in a tough spot as much as I would have disliked aiding a sponge or bum.

Some things are worth contemplating and the inputs are a useful aid in that.

ND4SPD · 05-10-2005, 7:53 AM

If the line is busted, what good is 4qts of oil? It'll pump it right back out within a minute or two. And how far was it from the freeway to the Walmart? How did he make that trek?

Pete · 05-10-2005, 8:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sheepofblue

he was sweaty

Crack withdrawals.

sheepofblue · 05-10-2005, 8:47 AM

The things that have me still wondering this morning:
Good
1) His demeanor was not that of a bum
2) He had some reasonable details on the type of car, problem description
3) When I told him a guess of 4 qts he looked upset/worried
4) When I told him to change the fluid again when he got home to save his transmission he was also not thrilled

Bad
1) No ID
2) His 'girl' was in the car. I would not leave a lady stranded alone in a strange location
3) As pointed out how did he repair it (possible rubber line that blew off though)
4) Centreville is a decent distance away what did he have for gas $$
5) He asked if I was headed toward University. This is the opposite that I was but if he was out that way why did he backtrack to this Wal Mart rather than walk toward town?

Oh well I may never know but would like to

Pete · 05-10-2005, 9:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sheepofblue

The things that have me still wondering this morning:
Good
1) His demeanor was not that of a bum
2) He had some reasonable details on the type of car, problem description
3) When I told him a guess of 4 qts he looked upset/worried
4) When I told him to change the fluid again when he got home to save his transmission he was also not thrilled

Listen, I had a very similar incident many years ago, with a guy that seemed totally legit, carrying a busted fan belt around the gas station. I gave him $20. A week later, I see that same phuck doing the same damn thing at another gas station down the road. I pulled in and ran his ass off.

Move along now.

ConqSoft · 05-10-2005, 9:07 AM

Why is this in Religion?

Pete · 05-10-2005, 9:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ConqSoft

Why is this in Religion?

Oops, I might not have cussed so much if I'd realized we were in "church."

Tornado bait · 05-10-2005, 9:33 AM

As soon as the new Walgreens went up in our neighborhood there were a lot of "needy people" hanging around outside asking for money. They always seemed to be a couple bucks shy of the price on their perscription that needed to be filled.

It's sad to say, but my heart has hardened over the years to this sort of thing due to the scammers.

sheepofblue · 05-10-2005, 10:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ConqSoft

Why is this in Religion?

I debated that but it is kind of a moral question so I decided against other

Also I thought that the question would be more likely to be answered from a moral standard which is the part eating at me.

EDIT: If you feel it is appropriate feel free to move it. You will get zero protest from me.

ND4SPD · 05-12-2005, 10:33 PM

I wouldn't be overly concerned sheep. As sad as it is, I have heard of people dressing like a bum during sporting events downtown Cleveland and hanging around the stadium/arena begging people for money; easily making $100+ in a couple hours.

I've seen/heard figures of stats of how much some bums can make. Some of them can collect as much as $30k/yr; tax free. Not that hard if you think about it.

sheepofblue · 05-12-2005, 11:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ND4SPD

I wouldn't be overly concerned sheep. As sad as it is, I have heard of people dressing like a bum during sporting events downtown Cleveland and hanging around the stadium/arena begging people for money; easily making $100+ in a couple hours.

I've seen/heard figures of stats of how much some bums can make. Some of them can collect as much as $30k/yr; tax free. Not that hard if you think about it.

Thanks after a bunch of thought I have concluded I was probably correct in assume a mooch. However I take it very personal because I have benefitted from the kindness of others in my lifetime, to do less in return when the opportunity arrises would be a huge mistake.

stegen · 05-12-2005, 11:36 PM

you are going to burn in hell for this one.

TAZ · 07-21-2005, 2:38 PM

When it comes to people in THIS country, there are reasons that poor people are poor. They could get education and jobs like the "rich people", if they chose.

Two words to live by: Personal responsibility.

I don't think you did the wrong thing. It is hard to say no sometimes, but you have to.

Kuss929 · 07-21-2005, 3:03 PM

Either way see you in Hell.

sheepofblue · 07-21-2005, 3:07 PM

Hope not, although I have it coming I have heard that my Shepherd is a rather forgiving one (my only hope)

ccwilli3 · 07-21-2005, 3:07 PM

its always his "wife" or "gf" in a car somewhere and he is out desperately seeking help so that they can get home!

I've heard this same story twice now in a 4 year period in a bestbuy parking lot. (I've been caught out in my car twice with the same tactic) I always roll my window down just enough to get my arm out if need be...

I listened to his sales pitch and it sounded familiar to the one a few years back. Back then I gave him $5. The clue was, back then he asked me if "I was familiar with the term 'seized up'. Not a common term used for car troubles. Well, he used the exact term again and I took note. His story was the same still, after all these years. A diff bestbuy a few years later, same story, what were the odds he'd see me again???

This time I told the guy to **** off and he kinda stood there like I had insulted him. Guess he didn't think I remembered. So then I say, move along and get the hell out of here! He just stands there like he wanted to do something about my assertiveness... I then inform him that he has me trapped and I will either A) run him over to flee for safety or B) shoot him in the face. I then promptly made available a cocked n locked HK 45.

He left then... I only post this because they sound tremendously alike in nature... I say you weren't harsh at all, just move on...

BizJetGuy · 07-21-2005, 3:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pete

Oops, I might not have cussed so much if I'd realized we were in "church."

The man upstairs helps those who help themselves. If he was seriously trying to solve an automotive problem, he would have gone somewhere that he could ask professional advice... not a inquiry to the man-on-the-street.

He was looking for a handout.

sheepofblue · 07-21-2005, 3:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BizJetGuy

The man upstairs helps those who help themselves. If he was seriously trying to solve an automotive problem, he would have gone somewhere that he could ask professional advice... not a inquiry to the man-on-the-street.

He was looking for a handout.

Actually I worked for hydramatic for a time so gave rather detailed answers to him, just no $$$. With hindsight he was scamming.